2012, The Year I found out what I'm Made of!

Another year has flown. At the beginning of this year, I had finally been diagnosed with depression and was bad enough that I felt I needed help from medications. I hated having that label. Mother with depression. Mother who couldn't cope. Not in the ball mother. That tape played round around in my head, making me feel worse and worse. The thing about this illness is the more you pretend you don't have it, the further you sink.

Well I chose not to sink further. I accepted my illness. Once I did that I found I was motivated to try and get healthy. Ethan was my battle cry. He deserves a mother who cared enough for herself to be well. He deserved more of me.

Taking part in Luschka from Diary of a First Child's Mamatography Challenge was a tool I used to get us out and about. It also helped me appreciate the good things in my life that I wouldn't normally notice.

In January, I started my Breastfeeding Peer Support Training course and by March, I was qualified. Being out in my community helping mummy's breastfeed was a huge part of my life, I made so many new friends.

In April, my baby turned one! We had entered a new stage, toddlerhood. Life with E was about to get wild! He was growing and showing us his awesomeness everyday. The summer flew right by!

Hello Fishy!

In July, my gorgeous hubby & I celebrated our 3rd wedding anniversary, Leather. I got a Cath Kidston bag, he got shoes from Clark's. We reminisced on how our lives collided and has turned into something even I as a dreamer wouldn't have conjured.

Sidekicks!

 

September arrived and just like that, I was 24. My party was the first time Ethan & his daddy had been away from me overnight. I had laughs and cocktails with my girlies and went to bed slightly more tipsy that I was used to. I felt content. This was also the month I got published!

In October, I realised that if we were lucky enough to be blessed with baby number 2, we were ready. My head says No my heart screams Yes. Being the sort of person that I am, we began TTC. I also got my tattoo.

"Out of the ashes it arises"

 

In November, I decided that I was well enough to begin weaning off my meds and by the 2nd Week in December, I was med free.

This year has made me question things I took as gospel, research & think about what values I hold dear and made me look at myself and begin to glimpse what Mark sees when he sees me. I have really worked hard at upholding healthy boundaries and the result is that I feel so much happier than I have done in a long time!

Next year, I want to remain healthy. Oh and learn to sew!

Happy New Year & thank you for following me on this journey for yet another year!

 

Posted with Blogsy